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Tales From Faerieland

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Tales From Faerieland



December 6th, 2007

You know, Una...a little biry told me he saw Red Crosse Knight at the local gentleman's club. He was apparently quite inebriated and took it upon himself to get a bit fiesty with one of the female employees. Just thought you should know what....I mean who...you are betrothed to.


December 4th, 2007


I am sooooooooooooooo excited!  Recrosse and I are engaged...well sort of.  My parents totally love him and said he could marry me.  The one snag in the plan is that he still has 6 years of service to complete to Gloriana.  That's one of the characteristics I love about good ol' Red, his commitment.  I know he'll be a good husband to me.  I'm also glad to see that his faith has returned!   I can't wait to start planning our wedding :-)




Three battles later, and the Dragon is defeated!
At times I didn't believe I could be victorious over the beast, but finally, after wounding him under his wing and then stabbing him through his throat, I prevailed. I must admit, I'm quite proud. Una's parents and her entire kingdom were showering me with praise, but the best thing of all is that Una's father has promised me Una in marriage. However, we have to wait, because I still owe six years of duty to Gloriana, the Faerie Queene, which I fully intend to serve. Archimago and Duessa tried to ruin mine and Una's betrothal with lies and deceit, but they were unsuccessful. We all know that in the end, faith and goodness win. Una and I and her parents and the kingdom had a wonderful celebration, but finally, I had to go and begin my duty to Gloriana. I look forward to my service to the Queene and ultimately, my fulfilling my destiny and marrying my one and only, my Una.

December 3rd, 2007

After searching for quite some time, I have finally been reunited with Redcrosse Knight.  We found ourselves near the Cave of Despair, and I became very worried about Red; I got the feeling that he was tempted to end his life while near the cave, so I took matters into my own hands.  I decided he should go to the House of Holiness to recuperate.  It is like a rehab center where people can become reacquainted with the virtues of life.  I think this center will help Red overcome his despair (I think he wanted to stab himself...).  I hear the House has a good track record with getting people back on the right path, so I hope they can help him...he has such potential, if only he believed in himself more.

wishing Red well...




Today my life was saved twice.
First, Orgoglio captured me, but I was rescued by the brave and good Arthur. Even so, my brush with mortality did little to lift my sinking spirits. I found myself at the Cave of Despair. I had hit bottom. And I was about to end it all. I know it is a sin to crave death, but I so desired rest. It seemed that immediate death was my fate. Besides, the longer I'm alive, the more time I have to sin, evil being that I am, slave to my innate urges to defy God. I was just about to stab myself through the heart when suddenly the knife was not there. My Una had again saved me. So I left the Cave and sought refuge at the House of Holiness, where I was rehabilitated by Mercy, Humility, Reverence, and Contemplation. Hopefully this rebirth of spirit will be enough to aid me in my upcoming battle with the Dragon.
Why can't people just handle their business on their own time?  Me and my cronies were trying to have a nice procession, so everyone could worship me, but Sansjoy had to come bursting in like HE was the center of attention!  Like, I know Redcrosse like killed your brother, but do you have any kind of RESPECT?  I'm glad I made you guys battle it out later, you were such a downer.

But now no one can seem to find Sanjoy after that fog thing happened...that's weird.  Actually I think Redcrosse took off with that really pretty chick (who I would LOVE to befriend) I kind of lost track of them.  Oh well, they won't bring me down, I know my place is still the place to be.
Well I think its time for some lovin' for my faithful squire.This guy has got my back! Like the time Deussa sent that dragon at us, and he jumped in the way. I mean he almost died for me( until I sprang back and saved him of course). What a team we are though. We're thinking of dressing up as none other than Batman and Robin for Halloween next year. I'd be Batman of course.

To the batcave Robin!


This is ridiculous! No matter what I do try and keep Una and that damned Red Crosse apart, she keeps finding a way back to him! What more can I do? I'm at the end of rope...I mean, I can't think of a way to make Duessa any sexier and more tempting than she is....at least I don't think I can. Suggestions, anyone?


December 1st, 2007

Stupid Una!

Yeah, yeah, yeah Una, you're just soooo great..whatever.  I have bigger problems.  Red and I were down by the stream today when Orgolio found us and was going to kill us.  My pleading stopped him...thank goodness!  I'm too cool to die.  To spare Red's life, Orgolio took me as his lover and threw Red in his dungeon!  Things just get worse from here.  All mighty Arthur shows up with none other than Una, of course.  I'm left in the dust...she goes to find Red Crosse to get him back and now Red sees my true colors as a witch! What the heck?! He was supposed to be mine!

December 2nd, 2007

So Red left me after his battle in the cave...what a lame move.  He didn't even explain why he left, all of a sudden I was alone, but not for long.  While in the forest, I befriended a lion.  At first, he was going to eat me, but let's be serious, who would want to hurt someone as amazing as myself.   When he got closer, he became a timid lion and a companion - I don't know what I would do without people to protect me, I am pretty gosh darn special you know.  I was pretty stoked to have a new friend, but I kept searching for Red.  While doing so, I ran into Sans Loy.  At first he seemed nice, but then he started to get all up in my business.  I began to scream and Satyrs came to my rescue.   I was thankful for the Satyrs' help, but I knew their reputation of being quite randy, so I went merrily on my way.  I'm glad I met Lion and the Satyrs, but I'm ready to find Red and leave this forest.

Wish me luck!


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